And if I were to die.. I won't get to work my first full-time job, I won't get to meet my husband, I won't get to see my first child or I won't be able to have my mother at my wedding and my daddy walking me down the aisle. It's all this little things that makes me want to live and love.
I know I have loved many but not being loved by many too.
I have a few close friends who are still supporting me even when I am in the wrong and I know they knew that I am feeling remorseful enough but they were kind enough not to chide me any further as they know to love me most when I deserve it least - that is when I need it the most.
And you, I want to be that friend for you too, but first i need to stand firm.
I've got to find my ground, & remember what made me the person i once adored myself.
its been awhile since i was comfortable in my own skin, been proud of what i've done, been happy with something i've adviced // said.
I'm working on to becoming a better person,
rather just to the person i was once, to start with.
I won't cry myself to sleep, like a sucker.
I won't cry myself to sleep, if I do, I'll die.
Don't you dare be weak amanda.
We tend to always go too fast, too young.
Flower crowns in my hair, dreams i'd rather not remember.
Promised anywhere that I would go, I'd take you with me.
Dancing on your feet like a child to the radio, spin me round.
What have we been dreaming of, the tingles, the fall, the trust, the thrill.
Every once in a lifetime, dreams can come true.
Bu- how funny, not everyone is lucky.
Maybr not me.
& i'll get over it.
The fuel that keeps me strong.
Disappointment, adjustments, do they change who we are?
Dear officer, is there a certain way im supposed to behave?
I think i'm bound to recreate the little things that i cant annotate & present.
Do you know how it feels like, to wake up knowing that nothing is right.
Dear officer, is there anyone changing me
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