I've been feeling detached, I've been wandering off my spot & I've come to a point where I've lost all means to be strong even just for awhile. Tonight I cried my heart out. I drank scotch & I drank vodka, I went up to the 57th fucking storey. I learnt to forget the haters. I've tried. I'm gonna make it through this shit. I've been talked to, I've walked around. I drank so much. Spent so much money, met new people. People that come and go. Learn to deal with that.
I've been secured with the authority of vulnerability in this cold period of my life.
Come what may.
Did eyeliner for myself today.
Felt a little better for awhile. Numb the pain.
Took photos.
Met people
I'm gonna do shit & I'm gonna do better.
Try to get up here with me. I am alread fucking here. Get up here on your own, make your fight at me.
It is on.
Take it or go cry.
You know your testimony is strong when your roots are so deep that other people’s storms will never knock you over.
You know what. I've been negotiating a lot with myself. & I decided I will not.
Because things will fall into place, I'll put my trust on that.
As much as I like to see people reunited, maybe that's a silly thing, but what can I say, I like to see people run to each other, I like the kissing and the crying, I like the impatience, the stories that the mouth can't tell fast enough, the ears that aren't big enough, the eyes that can't take in all of the change, I like the hugging, the bringing together, the end of missing someone. I still hope that we can all understand the power of absence.
Well, we can decorate absence however we want- but we are still gonna always feel what’s missing.
& trust me.
( unravel the end on your own )
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