Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Fuck!!! What am I feeling this is some real shit

I'll make it through if I wanted it to, I know that whatever that happens are because of the choices I make. & I have no one to blame. Only me. But I wished I could learn to hurt & heal faster. So I could learn to love myself even more. I know it's not logical to wish for anything but I find no strength in me to dive into anything that may hurt me. I know it sounds so stupid & melodramatic but I just can't help it GRRRRR. 
WHY??? after thinking so much, learning to think through everything on my own, everything I've heard everything I've learn why isn't this easy for me yet?? 

Mandy get your fucking shit together.
Before someone kicks your ass, that'll hurt way more. 

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