Let's keep this between us.

Maybe it's true when they say that a wise girl kisses but doesn’t love, she learns to listen but does not believe, & leaves before she is left. But i am still on my way there, i'm on my way.

I've dated a few guys over that past few months & it's not exactly something i can be proud or i am actually embarrassed about. It's just how i let myself go. I've felt the difference in kissing & making love without actually loving someone & vice versa. There is a difference there.
& i promise that the right person is worth the wait. Though i do not regret trying it out (before i do meet him) one bit.

I've come to terms with comforting & listening in times where i've offered my shoulders, hugs & ears to my friends. Life gets in the way, & i am in no position to tell anyone how they should feel, nor can they. But then again we accept what we feel is right, & what we see that's denied. Whatever we think is right. I guess that's how it goes.

I've learnt to love myself. in a way that i've no longer allowed myself to drown in a position of putting myself behind people who shouldn't matter. I've seen the sides of people that i learn't not to love, & to.

To my validation, i've left when i see no point, & i've stayed when i saw hope. I'll learn to leave when i see myself doing a ton more without a similar par of effort. 

I hope that's reasonable. 
That must be how loving yourself sounds like.
great. 

Now now,
I've also learned that people act & feel like their surroundings, after that i was scared to be sad & sometimes happy to smile.

Throughout the times i've spent with my aegi, i've seen a whole different side of a person that taught me something new.

I guess..
There are two different kinds of people, those that prioritise their emotions over anyone else's, & the ones who considers the balance within others.

I'm trying to adjust to a balance, to be sensitive & delicate on my expressions.

I'll love better.

Things will get better, i guess like they say,

"If you can't smile for yourself , smile for others"

I guess there are times where you just wonder why things create such a strong throw of irony right in your ass but then again you think about what you've done & what has happen & you reevaluate all these little details that all falls into place. 

Maybe life’s not a bitch after all. Life is a beautiful woman. 
We only call her bitch because she won’t let us get that pussy, LMAO

maybe we didn't want it enough, maybe we didn't try hard enough, maybe we just need to be a little more patient.

 Time makes a difference. Perseverance is gold. 

Then i think about it again, maybe you've.. or rather i might have been that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it.

 I hate to say this but i have to, i have to go down the chute. 

It's 2:51 & i'm anticipating for Verve Art's Festival tomorrow at The Arts House. Missing the workshops, bandanas & the slightly annoying voice of KHAIBITCH.

My little pekz is sound asleep & i'm literally in love.

I don't know how it happened, he outshined everyone that i've met, even the kinds i've always admired. I guess i do adore you with all my heart, if god was real he must've been busy, so he gave us a shortcut & here we are, & so to say. You're a lucky one, but so am i.

I hope time justifies everything we're feeling.

Thank you for making things better, thank you for loving me.

Goodnight.