i'm so tired of life..e. & i'm here overflooding with emotions.

I usually dont know who to blame since no one is really the only fault in a problem, but here it is, im seriously at a lost.

I guess im the temperamental one so i can only blame myself.
i feel so empty.

I feel so hurt too.

this kinda sucks.

& im so tired but i dont get to rest.
I dont get to rest but i spend so much time thinking about you/ trying to talk to you/trying to see you.
I dont know why,
but i do.
& it feels like my efforts are weighing lower on the scale,
it's tiring..

& i'm tired of playing games, i just wished you loved me for who i was & i wished i could believe all that people tell me but ive been scared by words,
only actions convince me.

I'm so tired that you could be my only motivation for now but i cant even look at you in the eye and tell you im not okay without having expectations or having a good enough response.
I dont know        honestly, what it means to love or care or why we do it.
Why.