I love you, prick

Do yall know how hard it was for me to hate this guy when he always made time for me, he was there to listen to anything I had to say.

my dear hun, i remember your angelic face, which has now turned into more of an annoying prick i love.

remember when we were friends, & we skyped on a daily basis?

I'm glad to say that every good feeling came from platonic feelings before everything happened. 

& I am so glad i found someone who makes it hard for me to stay mad, & I am grateful for every moment of fury and truth where I need to keep down my fumes & talk things out, everything we've faced has made me a better person. I learn & I understand more, I realize more. I see more of what the world has to offer, that maybe love does exist if you put your trust in to the things you never tried looking for. You'll be surprised at what you find. I am lucky. Because he's cute even when he doesn't try, he's always loving. & when there are doubt he knows how to make things clear & he assures me any other day. 

I used to be afraid to say that I am in love with this guy because I am afraid of losing anything I love. 

2014 hasn't made me stronger, I've been weak, I've been fragile. 

I doubt losing anything will benefit me in any way.
& i have cried way too much over too many silly things.
& i am glad i have you to snuggle up to me & tell me that things happen, & everything is alright with you, youre around. I'm safe.

& I am so sorry for all the times I stomp off at the little things you do that I can't bring myself to take.

You understand my pain, you take my fumes as love, & I am wholeheartedly grateful for your heart. I will keep it safe, I definitely know every imperfection I am made of, I know my flaws, I am aware of it & they live in my bones.

I am sorry for what I can't give, & what I am not. & for always worrying you because of the people I surround myself with, the gender, the crashing personalities you can't click and blend with. I am sorry for all the times you have walked off mad because I've been insensitive to your little fuels of jealousy. 

& I promise, that no one can compare to you. Because I chose you to share all my happiness & sorrows with, all my success & my failures, I hope you can handle all of that on that note. It doesn't matter how rich you are, how smart, good looking, fit, or well known you are. You are enough for me. 

You remind me of an angel & I will treasure whatever this angel brings me. Every flower you surprise me with, every cupcake, every banana milk. Every time we go out to draw, I will treasure those days, oh god I miss those days.

I'm busy, dy. I'm so busy & I love it. 

Just remember that I'm never the kind of person who loves less, I'm a giver.

& I love you so much, too.